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Sunday, June 27, 2010

Airplanes




High school circ 2004 I was doing my first online class. It was a sociology class where I was exposed to different cultures, religions, and ideas. I was asked to do a term paper for the class, and quite eaisly I was drawn to do one on the Gypsies -- a ethinic group from Romania that are known for travelling, at will, around the world.  They are known for living next door to you one minute, and right before you really get to know them, you wake up...go to their house..and their gone. .

This may seem like a random topic for a sixteen year old to be interested in, but looking back at  it subconsciously it fit perfectly. I have started to realize why my heart was drawn to them while analyzing my life thus far.

Growing up I have always felt a love of escaping, finding myself alone yet surrounded by others, being totally anonymous.

You see I grew up in cars and airplanes. Flying by myself every few months to various places by the age of ten I learned that I was most comfortable being surrounded by total strangers where no one knew me, no one could get a hold of me,  and I was going to a new place where my identity and persona would start fresh.

I didn't know it then , but both during the traveling, and the reaching of a new destination was where I would be most happy. Although there were ups and downs of traveling ( getting lost, earaches, etc) it was always exciting.   These feelings flooded back to me as I took the train/bus from LA-Oakland.

While on the train there was the rush of being near strangers who you are connected to at that particular moment in time, but whom you will never see again in your life.  Walking down the isles it brought a smile to my face seeing two friends curled up into each other on the seat watching the waves as we sped past, a young black man staring a a picture of his significant other and his child, the train master going back and forth checking the tickets, and a homeless man bargaining a deal out of him so he could stay on the train..

Returning to my seat, my window view would be a never ending display of images. Neighborhoods would turned into cities,  and cities into counties. Hundreds of people in these scenes would, for a split second, run in and out of my life--Walking their dogs, surfing, driving their car, sitting at a bus stop. It was as if I got to know about them , but not ever know them. During this time your life just is. It has nothing to do with your past, and nothing to do with your future, but EVERYTHING to do with your now.  you are free, you have no responsibilities, cares, or time tables.  You enjoy it as a time to prepare for your next destination.

I always loved being in a new place as well. Not getting to know people well enough before eventually poof like a Genie I was gone.  I remember clearly this happening as a young child.

After my parents divorced I was able to travel back and forth between various places. Between the ages of 10-16 I never lived in a place longer then 1 1/2 - 2 years. Utah, Colorado, Washington, California. I would hop flights between all of them. Enroll in new schools, meet new people, enjoy a new life. Yes, it would be hard when I first learned that again I would have to move, but when it was time to leave I was ready to go. These moves allowed me to  see the disparity between the rich and poor, the mountain people and sea people, the difference in cultures.

This constant moving soon set in as being a normal part of life, and I would become restless after a few years to move again. This is how I have been feeling lately . Living in Salt Lake for the past six years has been the longest I have lived in one place since I was a small child.

 That Escape Gypsy inside of me, or whatever you want to call it, has been aching for a new location.  Where I will go will be anyones guess, and when I will leave will be even more of a guess. It may be just for a vacation or to move for good. Whatever the road  I am  ready to pack my bags at a moments notice and leave everybody and everyone I know behind to find those in whom God will let me to share with my life with next. I will always find the real Brittani while moving from destination A-B, between airplane flights, bus stops, and train terminals. For to me this is c'est la vie

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